dinner party

watched big fish tonight. horrible results.
we were at dinner. there were inappropriate comments. I left with a rage and started to break everything within reach.  a mirror shattered on me. blood was everywhere. Everything was a horrible pain. I had to keep moving or else it was too painful. someone grabbed me and was keeping me from screaming and getting away.... It was the two of them.... struggling to keep me injured and for their own. One wanted me to die. One to nurse me back to health only to do it all over again.
Somehow found myself in galoshes and a towel. Both coated in blood instantly. was laid down and told not to move but the lesss i moved the more it hurt and the more it would heal. I was scared but I thought I wanted to die., Thought that would make things berttter. who knows. this was awful. the emotion was right there when i woke up i thought i was bleeding since the sheets were wet but it was just tears.

change...

its crazy how people lately come into my life and drop some serious knowledge within minutes of me having a conversation with them.... I am the queen of TMI but maybe it can be a good thing. Knowledge allows us to grow as people. Sharing experiences with people ( I think) helps me develop my own self.
who the fuck knows anymore.